Hijacked

About two months ago while driving to work, I was hijacked. Not highjacked by a person, but by a mysterious overwhelming feeling of terror. I thought I was having a heart attack. My face started to sweat, my heart rate shot up, my legs began to shake, I thought I was dying…

I went to urgent Care because it was close. I hobbled into the building and spoke with a trembling voice, ” I’m not sure what’s happening, but I feel like I’m going to faint.” I signed in and immediately went to the hospital bed where they ran a series of tests. All test came back excellent. Apparently, I wasn’t dying after all. So, they sent me home. When I got home I explained what happened to my wife. We were both bewildered. From that point on things just got worse. I was waking up in the middle of the night with a sense of terror, anxiety, fear and felt I was sinking into a dark hole. The next morning was terrible. I literally could not get out of bed. I was experiencing a terrifying wave of heat going through my body, over and over. My legs were shaking and convulsing. My world seemed disconnected to everyone else’s. I just laid there staring at the wall for hours, rehearsing in my mind that I was most certainly dying.

“There’s no way someone can feel like this and not be on their death bed,” I thought. Day in and day out, things just didn’t change. So my wife and I went to the emergency room. Once again, they ran all the tests, plus a few x-rays. The doctor told me that I was going to be ok! He thought my problem was due to too much supplements. Hmmmm. Something didn’t seem right. Something hijacked me and I knew it, I just didn’t know what it was…

My wife decided to search online about others who have experienced such phenomenon, and found some interesting leads. There were testimonials of others who were having these symptoms as well.

They defined it as a “nervous breakdown.” Or what the the medical field would call “clinical depression.”

It was a godsend to find these stories. These stories lead me to find out what it was that hijacked me, and what I needed to do. After lying in bed for two weeks, shaking like a leaf, I decided to go to the doctor.

When I got there, I told the doctor everything. She understood the issue and prescribed “Lexapro”and some anxiety medication to allow me to deal with the craziness. I started Lexapro, but did not take anxiety meds. After a month the symptoms subsided and I began to feel better.

For a few weeks I was seeing much improvement, and began doing things I use to enjoy again. Then one Friday evening while at work, I was hit by a sudden anxiety attack. This was crazy. My whole body just broke out into a massive sweat. My knees buckled. My stomach dropped like I was going down a massive hill on a roller coaster. I ended laying on the floor in the bathroom at work. I was throwing up and extremely sick. I went to the emergency room again. This time they knew what happened. It was an induced panic attack. Which really was more like another hellish breakdown. This one knocked me down for a few weeks. Now I’m slowly recovering. I have bouts with anxiety and low moods. My idea for writing this blog was to open up discussions on how we can find solutions, remedies or just a place to talk it out. I know for me, when you talk to someone who has been through this, or is going through it, it greatly helps. I am a Christian, my Savior is Jesus Christ. Without Him I could have never gotten through the darkness. I do hope this blog helps you.

Sincerely

Jeff Rose

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